TheChampagneSommelier goes wild with a Pornstar Martini. [read the full champagne story]
Estimated reading time: 5 minutes
[photo credit – thefoodmarket.com]
How to Use Champagne in a Pornstar Martini Without Offending French Wine Enthusiasts
So, you’ve decided to dabble in the art of cocktail making, and what better way to flex your mixology skills than with a Pornstar Martini? It’s the drink that says, “I’m classy, but I also know how to have a great time,” which, coincidentally, is the exact vibe champagne brings to the table. But how do these two glamorous liquids coexist in a cocktail without causing a national incident in France? Let’s dive into the delicate dance of adding champagne to a Pornstar Martini, and keeping everyone happy.
Step 1: Pick the Right Champagne (or Something Bubbly)
First things first: don’t break the bank. This is a Pornstar Martini, not your grandmother’s 100th birthday celebration. Sure, you could drop serious cash on a bottle of Dom Pérignon, but most of that is going to get swallowed by the passion fruit, vodka, and all-around fun. Save the good stuff for when you’re on a yacht. Instead, opt for a nice prosecco, cava, or the affordable-but-effective champagne your local store carries. Your taste buds will thank you, and so will your wallet.
French purists may cringe, but hey—this isn’t a wine-tasting competition. This is a cocktail named after an adult film star. Let’s all lower our monocles for a second.
Step 2: Don’t Pour It in the Glass Like a Maniac
Contrary to what some may believe, the champagne in a Pornstar Martini is not there to add fizz to the entire drink. It’s not meant to be the sidekick that gets muddled into the background, lost in the passion fruit abyss. No, the champagne is served in a separate shot glass alongside the main attraction. It’s like when a celebrity walks the red carpet with their publicist—they’re clearly essential, but it’s not their night.
DO NOT pour the champagne directly into the martini glass like some kind of rebel. If you do, you’re basically telling France that they should start using ketchup on croissants.
Step 3: Sip, Don’t Shoot (Unless You’re Feeling Naughty)
Ah, the great debate. Do you sip the champagne as a classy chaser to the sweet, tangy, vanilla-infused goodness of the Pornstar Martini, or do you throw it back like it’s a tequila shot at a frat party? The answer depends on how chaotic your energy is tonight.
The traditional method involves sipping the champagne in between your martini sips to refresh your palate. You know, like a civilized human being who enjoys balance in life. However, if it’s a rowdy Friday night and you’re two cocktails in already, there’s no harm in going off-script and knocking back the bubbly in one go. Just don’t blame me when you’re hiccupping and giggling through the rest of your night.
Step 4: The Champagne: Cocktail MVP or Benchwarmer?
Here’s the thing: the champagne in the Pornstar Martini isn’t just there to look pretty (though it does). It’s a palate cleanser, which sounds fancy until you realize it’s also the cocktail equivalent of a refreshing breath mint between bites of candy.
Without the champagne, the Pornstar Martini could get a little… intense. It’s sweet, fruity, and rich—like an Instagram influencer with a suspiciously large number of followers. The champagne breaks up the sweetness, cuts through the richness, and reminds you that, oh yeah, you’re a person with taste, not just a sugar addict. It’s the level-headed friend who stops you from sending that risky text at 2 a.m.
Step 5: Finish with Flair
Now, this is a classy drink, so please—don’t chug it. Resist the temptation to pour the champagne into the martini glass and down the whole thing like you’re at a frat party in Saint-Tropez. Instead, alternate sips of the martini and the champagne, feeling like a true cocktail aficionado (while ignoring the side-eye from your friend who’s secretly Googling what the heck a Pornstar Martini is supposed to taste like).
If you’re feeling bold (and let’s face it, if you’re making Pornstar Martinis, you probably are), go ahead and top off your glass with any leftover champagne at the end. Just remember: that extra fizz is both a flavor enhancer and a metaphorical “I do what I want” to anyone who thinks there’s a right or wrong way to drink it.
Conclusion
There you have it: a foolproof guide to incorporating champagne into a Pornstar Martini like a pro. Whether you’re at a cocktail party trying to impress your friends or simply drinking alone while listening to smooth jazz (we’ve all been there), the key is balance, fun, and a subtle disregard for the strict rules of champagne consumption.
